I’m sure you’re DYING to know the results of my polls. I have been overcome with emotion at the sheer volume of responses. All this time I thought I only had three readers. Oh no, dear friends! I was underestimating my funny!
THERE ARE SEVEN OF YOU! SEVEN!
I can hardly stop the tears from welling up.
(I have an average of 35 hits a day and while that may seem small and insignificant to a pro blogger, and while 85% of those are Google accidents, I must say that I feel honored that THAT MANY people actually stop by on a daily basis to see what kind of crap I’m rambling about now. The fact that seven of you would take the time to vote makes me see rainbows and kitten-filled bubbles. Even if five of you are related to me. NO I’M NOT BEING SARCASTIC I SWEAR.)
So! For the results!
On the issue of Coffee:
Five of you find coffee to be as fulfilling as I do. It is your propellant in the morning, your fuel during the day and your late-night comrade. You also have a completely flushed digestive tract and the bladder of a camel.
One of you is in it for the free wifi, which……….dood, I totally understand. Barnes & Noble ROCKS.
One of you thinks it’s yuck. I don’t think we can be friends anymore.
On the issue of Men With Goatees -
You’re all kinda divided on this one. Personally, I think the right cut on the right face is grounds for some bomchickawahwah, while others might as well go on and send the local authorities their front and profile shots cuz that right there? Is a crime.
Three of you think goatees are dignified.
Yeah. About that………
On the issue of Elderly Drivers:
Everyone voted for respect! I’m so proud!
Wait…..there were only 6 votes. Meaning one of you didn’t find an applicable answer. I’m going to assume that means one of you lets your cat handle the road rage for you. I mean, that IS the only other logical explanation.
On the issue of Spiders:
Most of you share my thoughts on spiders. A couple of you (MAWM) think spiders are here for the greater good and they will protect your plants from harmful insects and yada yada yada.
Aaaaaaand last but most definitely not least, the issue of This Here Blog:
There’s a lot of puckerin’ goin’ on! SIX of you think I’m funny! One (I know who you are! ;0) ) could do with a little less of the EFF WORD. I’ll try to tame it down a little. Unless there’s another spider in my office. Then we’ll have to compromise. That shit’s nothing to fuck around with.